DAYR EL-ZOR:
You can imagine the delight we at SyrPer experience when we hear ISIS executing 200+ of its own murdering rats on the charge they fled the scene of battle. In this case, the executions were reported by ISIS itself in Al-Raqqa. The 200 or more vermin were once in Dayr El-Zor as part of the major invasion force to recapture the old glory days when ISIS was rampaging throughout northern Iraq and Syria. Well, it’s not so any more. ISIS has been stopped cold by both the Syrian and Iraqi armies, all supported by efficient and committed militias.
The military situation in Dayr El-Zor has shifted mightily toward the Syrian Army commanded by Maj. Gen. ‘Issaam Zhahreddeen, the legendary Syrian paratrooper who takes bullets just like his men. Yesterday, we reported the event at Jafraa when a Libyan Barbary ape tried to open a gap in the base defenses by driving a fully rigged T-55 tank and detonating it at a major southern checkpoint. It did not work. The tank was destroyed by SAA anti-tank weapons and the driver is now a mist of molecules someplace in Hell.
What we did not know at that time, due to uncontrollable jubilation, was that the SAA did not merely stop at blunting the operation. It appears the SAA was already prepared to launch both air strikes and ground operations to pursue the offending rodents both in Jafraa and Huwayjat Al-Sakr. Hundreds of ISIS rodents were killed – the exact number still unknown as the area is being assessed. Wael has heard that it is more than 500.
The entire campaign to either take control of Dayr El-Zor or to invade the base is in question, especially since so many of the rats have jumped ship and left for more secure bases only to find their Caliph aggrieved by their actions. This Caliph of Cockadoodledoo doesn’t show much sympathy for his stalwarts. He ordered them executed – each with a shot to the head. We suspect that as the executions of fleeing rodents increase, word will get out and so will the rats, their voyages back to England, France, Belgium, Germany and Holland to be savored by all who share our Schadenfreude.
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DAMASCUS – AL-QALAMOON: SISTER-IN-LAW OF ABU ‘ALI AL-SHEESHAANI ARRESTED BY SYRIAN AUTHORITIES AS SHE SETTLED IN THE QALAMOON.
Well, he’s not Chechen. His real name is Anas Yahyaa Muhammad Al-Jarkas, born in Al-Qusayr, Homs, SAR of the union between Khadraa Jammool and Yahyaa Al-Jarkas. The sister-in-law is Laylaa ‘Abdul-Kareem Al-Najaar. She is married to his brother, Muhammad Jarkas. You see, Abu-‘Ali confabbed with Laylaa from his rat hole in ‘Arsaal and convinced her to leave Muhammad because he was an “agent of the regime”. Laylaa admitted during interrogation that she did not want to live with “infidels” (Kuffaar) and left her husband for the Qalamoon. This Abu ‘Ali character is quite a card. He officially belongs to Nusra, in which he is under the direct command of Hamza Qarqooz, but, has declared his loyalty to ISIS and the Caliph of Cockamamee. Go figure.
Many of you will be shocked to learn that this Abu ‘Ali Al-Sheeshaani, the Salafist and Takfeeri crusader for freedom and justice in the Islamic World, still works at his favorite profession – smuggling. That’s right, he used to smuggle cigarettes from and to Syria via the Northern Bekaa Valley. Today, he is smuggling hashish. If you want to know anything about the decay of this kind of Islam, study the life of Abu ‘Ali Al-Sheeshaani.
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